Framing and grit as ways to handle Title IX respondent’s stress.

If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve received a notice of allegations from your college’s Title IX office that tells you horrid news that you never expected to hear:  A friend, or perhaps someone you trusted, now says you sexually assaulted them.  The devastating change in your social status that follows, risks serious damage to your career, and to your health.  In terms of your physical and emotional health, please consider just TWO suggestions to help you along the Title IX investigation and adjudication process:

First, FRAMING:

You can view the stress  you feel every time you get a text or an email from the Title IX investigator, as something that is wreaking havoc on your body (and it can) or as something that is giving you the strength and energy to overcome adversity.  Have no doubt that the Title IX office causes you to release cortisol and adrenaline at every single step of the way.  This is no different than when you lift; so you can PR, or go to failure, or stop (which would not be a good idea). What is a good idea is to frame the stress the Title IX investigation causes you as no more than a weight, that you need to move, and that will get you stronger.  To reach the mindframe required to understand that this weight will not crush you, consider developing:

Second, GRIT:

According to super star behavioral psychologist Angela Duckworth, GRIT means passion and perseverance for long term goals.  That tiny sentence packs a punch!  Focusing on GRIT’s passion and perseverance components make the difference when dealing with events that can seem overwhelming, against the odds, and just plain hard.  A Title IX investigation and adjudication will seem like all of that to you--overwhelming, a betrayal, and worse, use legal ideas and rules you probably never thought about before and that are not intuitive.  

A Title IX investigation drops you in the middle of the Olympic pool.  Whether or not you like water, your best bet is to start swimming with passion and perseverance.  Grit gets you to the other end of that pool, and certainly prevents you from drowning.  Grit will do the same as you and your legal team move through the many phases of a Title IX process.